Monthly Archives: June 2014

10,000 Potatoes!

Well, it’s been two long years, but we finally did it. We reached 10,000 potatoes. 10,242, to be more or less exact. That’s more potatoes than I ever thought I’d have. Way back when I started out, even 1,000 potatoes seemed like a big number.

I can’t say how much it means to me that we’ve come this far since then. So I just want to say thank you — to each and every one of you — for giving me potatoes.

I love potatoes.

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3.12 Ultima Ratio

Okay, I really need this to be over. I love you, Katana, but your reign must soon come to an end.


Katana: Maybe it will. I’m cursed, remember? LOL.

Razor: Well, now that we each have a foot in the grave, I suppose we are truly equals. What do you say?

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3.11 Hasta la Vista

ALMOST THERE, GUYS! I’ve been sorting my screenshots and this should be approximately the third-to-last chapter of Generation Three. Then I get to throw out an heir poll and let you do my dirty work for me. ‘Til then, it’s Langurds all day err’day. Well, that and scanning all day err’day. My nostrils are haunted by the scent of centuries-old onionskin paper and I want to type “.pdf” at the end of every sentence. Somebody help me.pdf


What was I just saying about how I wanted more Tewl visits?

Katana: Gtfo, you’re scaring my babies.

Tewl: But I’m bein’ all scholarly an’ shit!

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I WAS a kid in a candy store…

…and now I’m being dragged out of the store, kicking and screaming and making a huge scene after being denied the sugary goodness that was so cruelly thrust under my nose.



I’m sorry, EA. I was under the impression that “through June 16” meant “up to and including the actual day of June 16.” I guess I was asleep when the meaning of “through” changed to “lol fuck you sale’s over.”

I’ve been teaching myself to think before I throw my money at things, so I decided to wait and ponder, naively trusting that I could jump in on the last day and make my purchases… and now it’s 7:35pm EST on June 16 and dat shit back to regular price. Or should I say ridiculous price? In any case, it’s a price I refuse to pay until they decide to cut it down again.

Man, I just feel cheated. And dumb. Especially after requesting all your expert opinions. Laserkatt even reminded me to act fast, and of course I didn’t.

The moral of the story is: don’t wait, just buy stuff.

Thank you for the valuable life lesson, EA. I’ll be sure to mention you in my speech when I’m rich and famous in deep, deep credit card debt.


Back to regular programming next time! XD

I’m a kid in a candy store

Has Snowflake Day come early?

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3.10 Deus Ex Machina

Can I publish two chapters in one day? Probably not. No, definitely not. But this site is nearing its second birthday, and TS4 is slated to come out way too soon, and look at how not-far we’ve come.

So I’m setting a goal for myself as of right now. The Langurds are going to birth their 6th generation before the year is out. Is that even remotely possible? Probably not. No, definitely not. But it should at least spur me into action.


How many “lonely Razor in a lonely bed” pictures can I get away with posting? The answer is many, because it never gets less sad. This one, however, comes with a different sentiment. After a quick trip to the Sim Bin and back, the Langurds can sleep in their beds again! Hallelujah, and good riddance to Glitchhilda.

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3.9 Folie à Deux

Bonjour à tous!

And holy schmagoly, guys, could you be any more awesome? Last week, I tried to quit coffee and it was a real bad time. But I also got an army of simselves and a gargantuan legacy reading list, so that was cool. It seems you were all churning out some fantastic stuff while I was off in my struggle bubble, just trying to pull a chapter together. Now I’m racing to catch up so I can participate in heir polls and stuff, like a clueless citizen reading up on politics the night before an election. Oh wait, that’s also me.

I hope you’ll forgive me if the simselves don’t show up for a few chapters yet. I currently have a screenshot backlog of 2000 or so, meaning these pictures are like ten months old, and I haven’t opened the game in about as long. And I wonder why my captioning is so shoddy.


We return now to the House of the Elements, where I can say with certainty (and lots of gusto) that WINTER IS COMING! Danger lurks beyond the Wall and oops, Razor’s plants went dormant so I figured out how to grow stuff inside. It only took me twenty minutes.

Razor: It is clearly labelled “planter bowl.” How hard could it be?

REALLY HARD SHUT UP. #12yearsan00b

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