Monthly Archives: January 2016

Tewl on the Red Carpet

I always say “late to the party” is my middle name…


But this is just the piece de resistance. Some beautiful human(s?) nominated me for three Golden Plumbob Awards over at, and I didn’t even know this was a thing until other bloggers started talking about it…? Whoever you are, thank you to infinity and beyond! ❤ I’m doing a squealy little happy dance right now. Internally, of course.

This mess of a blog is up for Best Sims 3 Legacy and Funniest Sims 3 Story! If you’re inclined to vote, please go take a gander at the nominees. You don’t necessarily have to vote for me — I’ve got some tough competition (and friendly faces) in both categories, but I thought I’d spread the word in case anyone is later to the party than I am. Or not a Boolprop member. See, that would be a valid excuse.

The third category is Most Jealousy-Inducing Graphics, but I’ve been drooling over the frontrunner’s pictures forever so I’m not going to beg for any votes there. I am my VGA card is incredibly grateful to even be mentioned.

Real update coming soon, and if you need a little light at the end of the tunnel — five chapters to the next heir poll!

Happy Simming!


5.8 Lukewarm Enthusiasm

Who is Luke, and why is he warm? Why isn’t it Michaelwarm or Garywarm? Why does Luke get all the glory? Why am I writing these words and how do I stop?

Um, yes.

Previously, Gumby took a leap of faith stupidity and invested in a crappy resort called the Fool’s Goldmine. Several days into its operations, I decided we’d better check in on the place to ensure that leap doesn’t end in a deadly fall.


Receptionist: Oh boy, here we go again. *sigh* Hi, welcome to the Fool’s Goldmine. Can I interest you in a stale breakfast or a cold shower?

Gumby: Miss, I own this place.

Receptionist: I’m sorry. Can I interest you in a FREE stale breakfast or cold shower?

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5.7 When Hell Freezes Over

…is when I’ll learn to update this sodding legacy.

Until then, we’ll all just have to deal with my natural blogging patterns, which—let’s be real—can be mostly summarized as: “When real life sucks, turn to Sims.”

And so, in a state of post-Christmas, cat-hates-me, roommate-got-a-boyfriend and it’s-cold-outside disenchantment, here we are.

It’s good to be back.


Omen: Just wanted to let you fools know I’m getting emancipated. You’re no longer my parents and I’m going into Sith training on Korriban.

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The Year of the Langurd

Well hello, my wonderful wonderful readers! Might I start by saying I hope you all had a magical holiday season, and if not magical then at least happy, and if not happy then I hope you at least got to take a nap at some point.

Also, Happy New Year! Weird that the last time I posted here was a different era – and what an era it was! Despite my lack of, erm, presence toward the end there, 2015 was this blog’s biggest year yet.

A few semi-shocking insights courtesy of the WordPress monkey thingamajig:

  1. In 2012 I posted 22 times. In 2013 I posted 19 times. In 2014 I posted 23 times. In 2015 I posted 40 FREAKING TIMES. Guys I am seriously impressed with myself, and with you for reading all that crap because quantity does not equal quality.
  2. There was a day in there (September 23rd, I believe) when this site got 284 hits. For reference, my average is about 50 when I’m actively posting. I remember watching the graph bar climb up and up that day and thinking “wtf are you doing, get down from there you idiot.” I feel like someone maybe just had loading difficulties because a bunch of those views were on Chapter 4.1 alone.
  3. I like to post on Tuesdays, apparently. (I was born on a Tuesday – coincidence?)

Naturally, WordPress has compiled a much more thorough and graphically satisfying report on these things, and it only took me five days to find it. Take a look if you want:

Here’s an excerpt:

The concert hall at the Sydney Opera House holds 2,700 people. This blog was viewed about 14,000 times in 2015. If it were a concert at Sydney Opera House, it would take about 5 sold-out performances for that many people to see it.

Click here to see the complete report.

Yeah, but also, if it were a concert at the Sydney Opera House, scandalized socialites would be pouring out the doors asking for their money back.

All that said, THE PAST IS THE PAST and I still suck at updating 8 months out of 12, so here are my plans for 2016:

  1. Quit coffee.
  2. Read 40 books.
  3. Tone down my grammar Nazi ways.
  4. Post MORE than 40 times because I am my favourite person to compete with.

Evidently, those are not all conducive to each other and fail to account for certain factors like, um, life, but I have a terrible case of January Optimism and I ain’t wanna be cured, yo.

^  ^ See, I’m doing #3 already!!


Happy Simming!