6.1 Wake Me Up When September Ends

Want to know what it takes for me to be productive these days? I am finally penning the first words of a post I’ve had prepped for three months, and only because…

a) Boolprop is running a marathon updating event where I get a shiny medal if I publish 3-10 of these bitches in October (spoiler: it won’t be 10)

b) My bedroom no longer gets a wi-fi signal thanks to the mythical router upstairs, which I am beginning to suspect is just a pair of rabbit ears stuck in a potato. This has cut me off from my #1 hobby of watching related YouTube videos until I can’t remember where I started or why I exist.

c) Yesterday’s quidditch tournament has rendered my every muscle completely useless, so I literally couldn’t do anything else even if I wanted to.

Why am I like this? D:

Anyhow, the stars have finally aligned—so here I am, making a start on GENERATION SIX!


We mark this milestone with a big “fuck you” to Isla Paradiso as we ship off to the Valley of Dragons.

DV greets us with an equivalent “fuck you” in the form of rain.


Like any Langurd migration (and this is the fourth, would you believe) this one did not go off without a hitch. Frieda got a tan. We lost the portraits. Axorn’s coat turned a brand new shade of not-quite-black under the new lighting.

Crash *in the general direction of his entire family*: Ugh.



Oh, and Gumby still can’t look at his wife without ending up on the floor. This could be a real speedbump in their relationship.

Gumby: It’s fine, I’ll wear a blindfold.

You’re scared of the dark.

Gumby: Dangit. Maybe I’ll just stay down here.

Crash: *shakes head*


Those made of tougher stuff test out the various novelties around the place.

Calamity: Bed is no novelty. Bed is life.

And this bed is Glitch City, but I refuse to delete something so beautiful, so we deal.


Fiasco nerds out over the new telescope, naturally.

Fiasco: Gee, what great visibility.

Hey now, I spent real-world money on that thing just for you!!

Fiasco: Oh boy, is that a tree? With LEAVES? How fascinating!



Meanwhile, Crash is getting good at running.

i told him not to break a sweat 1

i told him not to break a sweat 2



Rhapsody isn’t cool enough to get a directive, so she takes it upon herself to carry on a longstanding family tradition.

Rhapsody: Pinkie Pie is obviously the best.

Ten points to Rhapsody. Maybe I’ll give her more screen time if she hits 100 but probably not.


And Gumby carries on a tradition of his own.

Llama: Ohhhh Clayboy, I hath arrived! ❤


Every. Damn. Time.


Omen tries to invite people over for chess, but the new routing has him a little confused.

Jeff: Pretty sure this isn’t where you live.

Omen: What do you mean?


Tbh it’s not much better in the real thing.

Jeff: Why am I getting drenched indoors? Why can’t your house do house things?


My bad, apparently I don’t know how greenhouses work. #stillnotgonnarenovate

omen loses to jeff

Stupid Jeff still wins despite the blustery conditions. Should’a left him and his stupid family in Isla Paradiso. *grumble*


I probably should have left Frieda there too. Here, she’s just a leftover sim trying to make use of a leftover room.

Orangutan: Looks lonely in there.

Frieda: You too.

Orangutan: Nah, I got friends offscreen.

Frieda: Oh.

(Fyi, she’s not actually tanned. In CAS she’s her usual shade of dead-thing-at-the-bottom-of-a-lake, but in real time she looks like she actually has blood in her veins. Scandalous.)


Okay, so dragons in legacies are kind of cheaty, but I SPENT REAL MONEY ON THIS WORLD DAMMIT, so fuck the system, of course Cal is having a dragon.

Cal: Ohai there. Let’s talk about fire and stuff.

Obviously I did not research dragon hatching or anything beforehand so I just picked the option that seemed the most Calamity.


Oh hey, speaking of leftover sims…

Sky: What’s with the deer head?

Ah, yes – I like to think it’s a reminder of Rhapsody’s childhood trauma. I don’t know what happens in military schools, but I imagine the kids have to go out and shoot a helpless animal as some rite of passage or something, and then hang up the head as a trophy.

Sky: That’s just cruel.

Rhapsody: Wait ‘til you hear what the second task was.

Sky: No thanks.


We won’t start the next generation by holing up in our mansion, pretty as it is, so I send Cal out in the rain. She doesn’t seem too pleased?

Calamity: Aw man!


Calamity: I think I left my shawarma leftovers in Isla Paradiso!

I feel for you. No sarcasm, I really do.


This is how people socialize in Dragon Valley.


And apparently, the only people around here who aren’t scared of a few raindrops are tourists. Not that I have anything against them, but DID I MENTION I SPENT REAL MONEY ON THIS WORLD? Show me the fabulous rainbow townies!!


Quinn Flanagan: You called?

*checks bio* Town fool… gossip columnist…

That permanently sunburned skin, that snot-coloured hair—hell, I’m sold!


He’s here for a chess match with Omen, but Calamity swoops in fast. It’s set to be a romantic meeting for the songbooks, but routing fails them.

Quinn: If love is an open door, why can’t I get through yours?

He makes me want to simultaneously chuckle and vomit. I like him.


INTERLUDE: Look what hatched! Apparently the fire talk was supposed to hatch a red dragon, but why would my game ever do anything right?

blubsy the dragon

Probably because I refuse to take any part of this seriously.


But really, just look what it throws at me.

Quinn: I’m not like other guys, baby… *breaks into Thriller dance*


Jk, it’s chess or bust.

Omen: Ain’t got time for your shenanigans, Flanagan.

Quinn: Niiiiiice. A man after my own dead heart.

Watch out, Cal – your brother might steal this one right out from under you.


“Something evil lurking in the dark” indeed!! Jeffery, explain yourself!!!

Jeff: Uh, um…


Jeff: We were just talking about… pinecones. Right?

Skydancer: *giggle* Of course!

You two disgust me. LeffJeff will not be defiled on my watch!


Nor Omen’s, apparently.

Omen: Hey. Break it up.

Jeff: How was the chess match?

Omen: We won’t talk about that.


Besides its annoyingly elite chess players and nonstop rain, Dragon Valley is great in basically every way. That’s some Khaleesi shit right there.

Calamity: Dracarys!

Blubsy: *loud fart*

Calamity: Good boy!

What a team.


Of course someone had to test out the acoustics of that shower speaker.

Calamity: I’m too hot, hot damn! Call the police and the fireman / I’m too hot, hot damn! Make a dragon wanna—


Where’s Blubsy?

Calamity: He retired.

Well then.


Whoa whoa whoa, just where do you think you’re going?

Quinn: Skeedaddling before the cult kid can start a rematch! Toodles!

Darn you, Quinn Flanagan!

(I think I love him.)


Morning dawns, and the two youngest are really enjoying their lack of responsibility.

Rhapsody: Isn’t it great not being heir?

Crash: *licking wounds*

Poor guy was SO close too.


Did I say lack of responsibility? Whoops.

Rhapsody: Waaaaaaaiiiiiiiiit

Biggest drawback of having a huge house? It takes ghosts 3+ hours to get from one end of the lot to the other.



Skydancer: So you want to get sent back to military school, huh?

Rhapsody: I literally started floating at 8am sharp. What else can I DO?

Skydancer: Just get better at life, okay? Gosh.

the school here doesn't feed the children

Rhapsody may have dodged a bullet anyway – apparently the school here doesn’t feed the children.


Omg Skydancer. You can’t go around telling people to get good at life and then cook waffles with a red plumbob. You just can’t.


Fuck. I give up.


Sky saunters off to bed without a care in the world.

Gumby: Really, guys? Is this an ISBI?

I wonder sometimes.


Gumby FTW. Only time I will ever say that.

(Ironically, Gumby might be the most functional of them all if this were an ISBI?)


Did I say Sky went to bed? My mistake, I meant… WTF I DON’T EVEN KNOW WHAT I MEAN WITH THESE FOOLS ANYMORE


She’s camped out in the mausoleum chamber I already have prepared for Calamity, which is only a little creepy. (Yes, we are working on our lighting issues.)


Before Calamity can occupy that chamber, she’s sure as hell going to pull off this firefighter LTW. And it’s gonna be a shitshow. Day One, here we go!

Cal: Hi, I’m Calamity!

Emily: I’m going to play foosball. Don’t follow me.

Cal: Where is the love?


Socializing is for slackers anyway. Real firefighters stay focused on the job. Real firefighters… hack blindly at the engine while staring at a fleck of dirt on the floor?

Calamity: I love my job!


Not kidding, everyone else around here seems to think their job description is “play all the games all the time.” This is her boss.

Boss Man: I love my job!

It’s a good thing it rains so much here, otherwise the town would be in deep shit. And by shit I mean fire. The town would be on fire.


You thought I forgot about the horses? Think again! I was perfectly aware of them all through the house design process, and I still failed to include a single hitching post, water trough, hay bale, or salt lick. Now I’m just seeing how long they’ll last.

Pokey: Screw you nerds, every man for himself.


Storm: Wtf, Dad?

axorn saw a unicorn for the first time

Well spotted, buddy.


But let’s get back to the important stuff, like Crash going to school shirtless and accidentally picking up his cousin.

Molly & Crash: *tense moment*

Don’t do it, Molly! Don’t go there!


…She went there.

please no

Not all simcest can be halted at the (overly aggressive) click of a button, though. Lance’s line and Tomahawk’s keep trying to merge behind my back, and I’ve given up on trying to pry them apart.


Rhapsody: *floats up quietly* Hey bro, what’cha readin’?

Crash: …


Crash: *massively delayed reaction*

Rhapsody: You know what could help you with those reflexes? Military school.

Frieda: If you disturb my slumber one more time, that’s exactly where you’ll be going.

Rhapsody: Well shit.


It took at least 32 phone calls, but we finally got Quinn back for another try at that romantic meeting. And at that chess match, dammit.

Calamity: I like a man in uniform.

Quinn: So do I.

Calamity: Wait what.

Quinn: Just kidding. Your brother and I are totally platonic.

Calamity: Wait what.


Fiasco interrupts this precious moment by wiping the board clean for Most Ill-Chosen Birthday Spot. I really have to hand it to him – Balboa’s was tough to beat.

Fiasco: This is where I live now!

About to become an even sadder version of himself, I see.


Fiasco turns YA and the entire household immediately starts bawling. (Except for Sky, the heartless cyborg.)




Crash: *sniff*






Literally one of the saddest in-game moments I’ve experienced. The reaper song didn’t play and I didn’t get a screen pull. Just a bunch of crying sims and a lonely tombstone that I spent five hours searching for.

I’ll let this guy illustrate my feelings in the first instalment of “Tragic Crash,” a new photo series that will feature in several chapters to come.


Isn’t it beautiful?

But wait! It’s about to get even sadder up in here. For his final trait, Fiasco rolled—wait for it—Party Animal.


Since we clearly can’t take that in the conventional sense of the word, there’s only one way his life can go from here.


I handily changed his LTW from Vocal Legend to Bottomless Nectar Cellar, which is already more than halfway done thanks to Katana’s travels.

Fiasco: Pokey is dead! Everything sucks!


Fiasco: Oh hey, I suddenly feel so much better about things!


Thus begins the downward spiral that was always waiting to happen.


And on that note, I think I’ll call it a day!

I must say a big thank you to the mod team at Boolprop.net for lighting a much needed fire under my butt. For anyone interested, SimNaWriMo (Sims National Writing Month) is running through October and promises to be a hell of a party. There are three different forum medals up for grabs—a bronze medal for three updates in a month, a silver medal for seven updates, and a gold medal for ten. This is probably the biggest dilemma ever for someone who is both tirelessly competitive and incurably lazy. Which is why I’ve decided to keep my updates a little on the shorter side this generation, just because I’m a big fat cheater so I can have some hope of getting one of these medals. If I end up with bronze I promise to be Tom Daly and not the Chinese men’s gymnastics team.

Thanks as always for putting up with my incompetence, and an extra thank you to those who nominated me for the Sunshine Award three decades ago!! I have a post ready to go for that, but I figured I didn’t deserve to post it until I put out a real update. Yes, I am occasionally capable of self-discipline.

Until next time, which shouldn’t be too far away,

Happy Simming!


About gryffindork7

I like cats. This is a really thorough bio.

Posted on October 4, 2016, in Generashun 6 and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. 20 Comments.

  1. Man, Fiasco is ripped! Check out those abs in that last photo! And LMAO, Crash makes the *best* faces. He would have been a decent heir, even with the mute-ism… is that word? Totally is now.

    Quinn is the perfect mix of overly bright and adorable. He would be a fitting spouse for this family. I do feel a bit sorry for Calamity to have to breed with him, but hey, for the good of the legacy, right?

    Liked by 1 person

    • Oh gosh, apparently this generation is where I really got behind on comments, lol.

      My default skin replacement really makes everyone look inappropriately shredded. XD I guess it’s kind of like an everlasting homage to Tewl.

      Quinn really was one of the best fits for this legacy. I almost feel bad about the way things went with him…



    CRASH! You awesome mofo.

    Welcome back, Griff. 😉

    Liked by 1 person

  3. I always forget that like 90% of your Sims are actually ghosts now, so watching them fail at menial tasks is always good for a laugh.
    I looove the new house even if it is glitchville, Dragon Valley is such a pretty one – I think I might take the Gordons there on their next move. That’ll happened whenever the town gets over populated by their spawn and everything becomes a game of ‘are they related…? Ehhh, close enough’.
    Fiasco’s birthday spot definitely deserves an award though, it’s the perfect combination of sad, confused, and a little bit desperate.
    Tragic Crash… Tragic Crash Fish? Or is that too much?
    POKEY NOO 😦 Well, at least Gumby’s old too, so it can’t be too long before they’re reunited in the afterlife!?

    Liked by 1 person

    • The way you say “I might take the Gordons there” and I’m replying to this five years late knowing that you’ve finished the legacy now. ㅜ ㅜ

      But thank you for the house love! Tragic Crash Fish is definitely a vibe and not too much at all.


  4. Oh no, Pokey died 😦 It probably didnt pull you because Fiasco decided to have his birthday. I mean SINCE WHEN DOES HE THINK HE’S SO IMPORTANT ANYWAY?
    That Tragic Crash is a true work of art, however.

    Liked by 1 person

  5. Hello there! Greetings! I have come from distant stars to present to you the Versatile Blogger Award! Congratulations and enjoy!

    Liked by 1 person

  6. Duuuude. You’re the second simblogger to bring up SimNoRiMo. I have got to go over and sign up. I never meant to drop my Boolprop participation. Boolprop is awesome. Gaaah.

    Dragon Valley! I want to play there so goddamn badly. So of course the Samples are never moving worlds again, and I’m sending the Wonderlands to a modified Midnight Hollow instead. Someday. Someday. I hope?

    I still love Crash, but holy crap I want Calamity to breed with that berry sweet nightmare so badly. And firefighting is my favorite active career. This makes me so happy.

    I laughed so hard at Axorn seeing a unicorn for the first time that I almost peed myself. WTH do you still have memories turned on? You know they trash your game performance right?

    Liked by 1 person

    • Oh, hey, I read this one too. It’s great that I don’t remember things because I laughed my ass off.

      Liked by 1 person

    • SimNano is always a time! It’s actually running this month, but I never signed up because I figured there was no way I’d be productive enough. Now I’m on a posting spree, but I know the moment I sign up will be the moment that ends, so I’m letting Murphy’s Law do its thing.

      Have you had a chance to play Dragon Valley yet? It’s one of my favourite worlds (you can probably tell), but I am SICK AND TIRED of lightening all my screenshots. XD The Langurds will definitely be moving somewhere sunny next.

      Calamity’s generation was a hoot. If I could go back, I’d get like twelve more kids out of her and Quinn (sorry Siesta) just for the variety.

      And LOL I’m an idiot who forgets to adjust literally every setting each time I install/reinstall/update stuff, so sometimes they creep back in. I didn’t know they were that detrimental beyond being obnoxious af, though! Thankfully they also create hilariously dumb moments like this, though. 😛


  7. It took me 4 yrs, but I finally got all caught up! yay… also, as a habitual lurker, I am proud to say that I commented three times in one day. It’s a miracle and has never happened before (or ever will again).

    I never would have given that eyesore Quinn a chance. I can’t wait to see what happens next.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Congrats on catching up! …Well, to this point, at least, but it still deserves the congrats.

      If “dysfunkshin” weren’t the name of the game I certainly wouldn’t have either, but ironically he made some dang cute kids!

      Liked by 1 person

  8. I’ve been too busy with my own projects to read, much, and am just now getting back to reading, and OMG, I am SO GLAD! I LOVE this legacy, and your writing style, and all the characters!

    I’m going to miss Pokey, too, but we have Quinn to look forward to. I guess the computer giveth and the computer taketh away.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Whoa! Was this your first comment? And I still haven’t replied to it almost five years later?! Gosh, I am truly the worst.

      But thank you for giving this blog a chance! Happy to have you reading! 😀


  1. Pingback: Indeks | The Dysfunkshinul Legacy

  2. Pingback: Catching Up with the Spares 14.6 | Zale Family ISBI – Alphabetcy

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