Monthly Archives: July 2021
I told you these titles were going to start sounding dumb.
But Gryff, they’ve always sounded—
DO NOT FEAR! For this chapter does not actually have “no content,” just painfully little until the last few screenshots. So let’s cut to the meaningless drivel, eh?
Previously, there was a big Snowflake Day blowout (literally, the fireplace exploded) but ghost-Boa saved our butts with magic. Also, Siesta replaced Dudley’s Capacity to Love chip with Sinister Circuits—at least, I think she did. Try decoding thirty different screenshots of your sim holding a screwdriver suggestively in front of a robot, three years after playing the game and taking no notes.
At this point I’m taking complete creative license.
Dudley: Turn up?
Pete: Turn up!
And so we go where no Langurd has gone before—and probably much, much farther, but let’s take this one chapter at a time.
Previously, Tonu became a teen. I don’t remember his new trait, nor is it particularly relevant thanks to the constant fuckery of Unstable.
The only thing I can be sure of is that he definitely has a crush on Butler June.
Tonu: I’m a turtle eating waffles.
June: That’s nice. I’m a butler eating cake.
Jeez Kau, what’s got your suspenders in a knot?
Kau: I just found out there are at least TWO empty beds in this house.
Kau: …and I’m SO happy to keep sleeping in my roof tent even though it’s winter. I love it SO MUCH.Read the rest of this entry
Here we are at last! The final chapter of—
Nah, I can’t. That’s too cruel a joke.
You see, the previous longest Langurd generation finished at eighteen chapters. That was Gen. 4, when I sent the dweebs to university and did the dual heirship thing. The others have ranged from ten to sixteen, but it’s always an even number for some reason.
Today, we hit eighteen chapters on Gen. 7, and the amount of stuff that has yet to happen is ABSURD. I haven’t blocked anything out beyond 20, but my current guess is… 28? 30? And that’s just until I can post an heir poll.
The biggest worry is that this is the ONE generation where I can actually run out of chapter titles, because there is a finite number of the thing I’m basing them on. At the very least, they’re going to start sounding really dumb. I did NOT think this through, guys!
Shall we begin?
After witnessing Dusty’s tryst with his boss from across the street, Siesta stumbles out into the front yard with hot tub brain. Her gallivanting children are all trickling in just before curfew, so it’s bonding time.
Siesta: So that weather. It sure is weathery, huh?
Kiko: Mom, let’s be straight. Do you remember my name?Read the rest of this entry
I am currently on a rampage liking and replying to comments I left on read for half a decade. It feels a little dirty, like accidentally liking someone’s Insta post from five years ago while stalking them. *ahem* A reference I know only from pop culture, of course.
Consider this a pre-emptive/post-emptive apology for all the notifications!
What a dumb thing to make a whole post about, Sam.
Joke’s on me if people comment on this post and give me even more stuff to reply to.
Real post soon – Happy Simming!
Why hello! As promised, I’m doing my darnedest to keep this ball rolling. I may have bitten off more than I can chew with this chapter. With that in mind, I will not waste time trying to think of a cool intro, and I will simply say:
Welcome back to the House of Langurd!
But wait… that’s not our house?!
Acara: I’m at a homework party.
It’s just you at a desk…
Today this blog turns nine years old! I hate that for us. Tewl and his descendants have plagued our lives for too long.
While I like to put out a post every year just to acknowledge the day, the level of effort always varies. Second only to last year’s Paint cake, this may be the laziest celebration of all—largely because I prepared it for the 8th birthday, and then ran out of time to flesh it out and saved it for this year instead.
So here’s the deal:
The Great Langurd Psychoanalysis
Guys this legacy turns nine tomorrow. What the actual fork.
Will I make it under the decade mark at this point? Actually, I forbid anyone from answering that. Don’t even put it in the universe.
In other news, I am humbled by the fact that I can disappear for seven months and come back to one of these:
Once again proving that the people reading this blog are far cooler than the dweeb writing it. Thank you to anyone on Boolprop who voted for this dumb, inactive legacy. ❤
Alright, back to business. Gen Seven. Raising seven kids. And screenshots dated 2017 – which honestly just hurts, man.
How did we end up here?!
Ixi: Allow me to stage a dramatic reenactment.
Alright, I’m waiting.
Ixi: No, this is it.