Indeks

Foreword: Legacy Hall of Fail 2.0

Generation One: The Age of Dewchebags
1.1 A Most Inospishus Beginning
1.2 Bachillerz 4 Lyfe
1.3 Evrybuddy Luvs Tewl
1.4 Broez Over Hoez
1.5 Da Betrayull
1.6 Identitee Crysus
1.7 Partay Rockerz in da Howse
1.8 Angellz ‘n’ Demunz
1.9 Glitchiffy!
1.10 Da Retern of Da Flayme
1.11 Goin’ Nowhurr Fast
1.12 Boyz Will B Boyz
1.13 Altur Egoez
1.14 Wildurness Esplorerz
1.15 Waffulmageddun
1.16 A Nyte 2 Rememburr

Generation Two: The Age of Warriors
2.1 Rising from the Ashes
2.2 Revenge of the Vaccinator
2.3 The Last Hurrah
2.4 Romeo’s Quest
2.5 The Night is Dark and Full of Terrors
2.6 Lancelot the Brave
2.7 The Darkling’s Crusade
2.8 Journey to the Fire Nation
2.9 Blood Allies
2.10 There Can Be Only One

Generation Three: The Age of Adventures
3.1 Terra Incognita
3.2 Gung Ho
3.3 Aficionados
3.4 Au Naturel
3.5 Mi Casa es su Casa
3.6 Les Nouveaux Riches
3.7 Al Fresco
3.8 Schadenfreude
3.9 Folie à Deux
3.10 Deus Ex Machina
3.11 Hasta la Vista
3.12 Ultima Ratio
3.13 Hakuna Matata
3.14 Eureka!

Generation Four: The Age of the Enchanted Dollhouse
4.1 Come Play with Me
4.2 There’s a Snake in My Boot!
4.3 Bake Your Cake and Eat It Too
4.4 Make Him Better or Get the Buzzer
4.5 Mrs. White in the Library with the Pipe
4.6 Makin’ Things with Light
4.7 Come on Barbie, Let’s Go Party
4.8 Taste the Explosion
4.9 I Love You, You Love Me, We’re a Happy Family
4.10 It Always Comes Back to You
4.11 I Am Mrs. Nesbitt
4.12 My Baby All Gone
4.13 Oh Boy, That Tickles!
4.14 Sing Me to Sleep
4.15 Gotta Catch’Em All!
4.16 Bop It
4.17 Robots in Disguise
4.18 To Infinity and Beyond

Generation Five: The Age of Contradictions
5.1 The Living Dead
5.2 Trouble in Paradise
5.3 Procrastinate Now
5.4 Accidentally on Purpose
5.5 Bittersweet
5.6 The Perfect Storm
5.7 When Hell Freezes Over
5.8 Lukewarm Enthusiasm
5.9 Well-Preserved Ruins
5.10 Alone Together
5.11 Anarchy Rules
5.12 Crash Landing
5.13 Simply Brilliant
5.14 Tentative Conclusion
HEIR POLL!
TIEBREAKER!

Generation Six: The Age of Always Sleeping
6.1 Wake Me Up When September Ends
6.2 Voulez-vous coucher avec moi?
6.3 No Rest for the Wicked
6.4 Once Upon a Nightmare
6.5 They All Rolled Over and One Fell Out
6.6 Rockabye Baby
6.7 Boulevard of Broken Dreams
6.8 No Sugar Tonight in My Coffee
6.9 Whose Bed Have Your Boots Been Under?
6.10 No Sleep Till Brooklyn
6.11 Don’t Blame It on the Moonlight
6.12 Beds Are Burning
6.13 Lazy Hazy Crazy
6.14 Enter Sandman
HEIR POLL!
RESULTS!

Generation Seven: The Age of Beep Boop
7.0 Quinnspiracy Decoded: A Prologue
7.1 I’m a teapot
7.2 Forbidden
7.3 Switching Protocols
7.4 Loop Detected
7.5 Temporary Redirect
7.6 Upgrade Required
7.7 Blocked by Parental Controls
7.8 This is fine
7.9 Checkpoint
7.10 Early Hints
7.11 Login Time-out
7.12 Continue
7.13 Use Proxy
7.14 Insufficient Storage
7.15 Payload Too Large
7.16 Enhance Your Calm
7.17 Multiple Choices
7.18 Conflict
7.19 Site is frozen
7.20 No Content

Read the rest of this entry

7.20 No Content

I told you these titles were going to start sounding dumb.

But Gryff, they’ve always sounded

DO NOT FEAR! For this chapter does not actually have “no content,” just painfully little until the last few screenshots. So let’s cut to the meaningless drivel, eh?

Previously, there was a big Snowflake Day blowout (literally, the fireplace exploded) but ghost-Boa saved our butts with magic. Also, Siesta replaced Dudley’s Capacity to Love chip with Sinister Circuits—at least, I think she did. Try decoding thirty different screenshots of your sim holding a screwdriver suggestively in front of a robot, three years after playing the game and taking no notes.

Screenshot-633

At this point I’m taking complete creative license.

Dudley: Turn up?

Pete: Turn up!

Read the rest of this entry

7.19 Site is frozen

And so we go where no Langurd has gone before—and probably much, much farther, but let’s take this one chapter at a time.

Previously, Tonu became a teen. I don’t remember his new trait, nor is it particularly relevant thanks to the constant fuckery of Unstable.

The only thing I can be sure of is that he definitely has a crush on Butler June.

Screenshot-382

Tonu: I’m a turtle eating waffles.

June: That’s nice. I’m a butler eating cake.

Jeez Kau, what’s got your suspenders in a knot?

Kau: I just found out there are at least TWO empty beds in this house.

And?

Kau: …and I’m SO happy to keep sleeping in my roof tent even though it’s winter. I love it SO MUCH.

Read the rest of this entry

7.18 Conflict

Here we are at last! The final chapter of—

Nah, I can’t. That’s too cruel a joke.

You see, the previous longest Langurd generation finished at eighteen chapters. That was Gen. 4, when I sent the dweebs to university and did the dual heirship thing. The others have ranged from ten to sixteen, but it’s always an even number for some reason.

Today, we hit eighteen chapters on Gen. 7, and the amount of stuff that has yet to happen is ABSURD. I haven’t blocked anything out beyond 20, but my current guess is… 28? 30? And that’s just until I can post an heir poll.

The biggest worry is that this is the ONE generation where I can actually run out of chapter titles, because there is a finite number of the thing I’m basing them on. At the very least, they’re going to start sounding really dumb. I did NOT think this through, guys!

Shall we begin?

Screenshot-183

After witnessing Dusty’s tryst with his boss from across the street, Siesta stumbles out into the front yard with hot tub brain. Her gallivanting children are all trickling in just before curfew, so it’s bonding time.

Siesta: So that weather. It sure is weathery, huh?

Kiko: Mom, let’s be straight. Do you remember my name?

Read the rest of this entry

Lol

I am currently on a rampage liking and replying to comments I left on read for half a decade. It feels a little dirty, like accidentally liking someone’s Insta post from five years ago while stalking them. *ahem* A reference I know only from pop culture, of course.

Consider this a pre-emptive/post-emptive apology for all the notifications!

What a dumb thing to make a whole post about, Sam.

Joke’s on me if people comment on this post and give me even more stuff to reply to.

Real post soon – Happy Simming!

-Sam

7.17 Multiple Choices

Why hello! As promised, I’m doing my darnedest to keep this ball rolling. I may have bitten off more than I can chew with this chapter. With that in mind, I will not waste time trying to think of a cool intro, and I will simply say:

Welcome back to the House of Langurd!

Screenshot-1482

But wait… that’s not our house?!

Acara: I’m at a homework party.

It’s just you at a desk…

Read the rest of this entry

The Great Langurd Psychoanalysis (Not Another Birthday…)

Today this blog turns nine years old! I hate that for us. Tewl and his descendants have plagued our lives for too long.

While I like to put out a post every year just to acknowledge the day, the level of effort always varies. Second only to last year’s Paint cake, this may be the laziest celebration of all—largely because I prepared it for the 8th birthday, and then ran out of time to flesh it out and saved it for this year instead.

So here’s the deal:


The Great Langurd Psychoanalysis

123272920_103614128224681_1720996162896163599_n

Read the rest of this entry

7.16 Enhance Your Calm

Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha

Guys this legacy turns nine tomorrow. What the actual fork.

Will I make it under the decade mark at this point? Actually, I forbid anyone from answering that. Don’t even put it in the universe.

In other news, I am humbled by the fact that I can disappear for seven months and come back to one of these:

NhB9VVe

Once again proving that the people reading this blog are far cooler than the dweeb writing it. Thank you to anyone on Boolprop who voted for this dumb, inactive legacy. ❤

Alright, back to business. Gen Seven. Raising seven kids. And screenshots dated 2017 – which honestly just hurts, man.

How did we end up here?!

Screenshot-1290

Ixi: Allow me to stage a dramatic reenactment.

Alright, I’m waiting.

Ixi: No, this is it.

Read the rest of this entry

7.15 Payload Too Large

Well damn, this MUST be the longest year ever if I’m actually going to get an eighth post in yet. I thought we’d continue on that downward slope from 2016 – the peak year of this blog in all ways – through the pitiful four posts of 2019 and into the dark chasm of “I remember when there used to be updates.”

But alas! My advent calendar this year is in the style of a daily “to do” list, and today’s little paper said “write a blog post,” so I groaned and opened up ye olde screenshot folder to see what we were working with, and GOOD LORD HOW COULD I HAVE FORGOTTEN JUST HOW MUCH WE ARE WORKING WITH.

Please witness: Middle Children’s Reaction to Their Parents Having Quadruplets

Screenshot-1182

Ixi: I love Tanky!

Tonu: I love everything!

Hey guys. Take a look through the nursery window. I dare you.

Read the rest of this entry

7.14 Insufficient Storage

Would you look at that! Here we are in the final stretch of SimNano, and here’s Gryffindork of all people embarking on her last update with a whole week to spare! I’ve actually reached my personal goals already for wordcount and pictures, so I could theoretically put nothing in this post and still make quota. However, that would be kinda shitting on the honour system, not to mention ignoring the fact that I still have THOUSANDS of screenshots to plough through even after the month is out.

Still, I could totally make this a skimpy one—INSTEAD, I have chosen to tackle the most eventful chapter of the entire generation so HAHA yay me!

Screenshot-939

Siesta: Eventful? No thanks. We’re not fans of “eventful.”

Dusty: Yeah, no events please.

Read the rest of this entry

7.13 Use Proxy

Welcome back! Back to the Langurds, and back to the present day that actually took place three years ago (but we don’t talk about that). I have an incredibly pressing life decision to make this weekend, so naturally I’m writing this post instead.

Previously, our heiress popped out her first child (Acara) and jetted off to the future. She returns with pockets full of crystals and nanites, which are clearly what Dudley is “inspecting” here.

Screenshot-665

Siesta: Dudley no! Bad Dudley!

Dudley: Bad Dudley 😉

He’s skeevy but in the most innocent, unassuming way?

Read the rest of this entry