3.2 Gung Ho

gung ho [guhng-hoh] – adj.: extremely enthusiastic and enterprising, sometimes to excess. Adopted by US marines from Chinese Pidgin English.

This is my life lately. Why, only today I am “enterprising” to sew a dress, clean my room, do laundry, write four French assignments, and caption these 100-odd screenshots.

Not only that, but this chapter is so ambitious that the only other apt title would be “Five Birthdays, Three Life-Threatening Experiences, Two Destinies Fulfilled, Two Graduations, Two Kind-of Deaths, a Birth, a Party, an Abandonment, and a Wedding.”

Having read that description, you can probably just skip the chapter. But please don’t. I put my blood and tears into these things.

We begin with a father-daughter trip to China, undertaken by each party with a heavy heart.

Razor: O great spirit of Sim-Fu, grant me the strength to defeat the Abitar without glitching into oblivion.

Katana: Romeo, Romeo, wherefore art thou— Just kidding, I’m only upset about being outside.

3.1 Terra Incognita

Holy moly, generation three! I’ve been procrastinating writing this because it actually feels like progress. Until I remember that I started this legacy 18 months ago, not to mention I started attempting legacies when I was a preteen. Then it just feels pathetic.

A quick note: Thank you all for voting in the heir poll! In case you missed the mini-post, Katana won. By a landslide. Lance did so poorly I’m tempted to rookie haze her.

Another note: School has returned with a vengeance, but this time my courses are all—would you believe it?—really enjoyable, so it’s gonna be a challenge on more than one level to tear myself away and procrastiblog. Yes, I am kidding myself. I will, of course, be shirking my studies wherever possible. Still, when your prof integrates this video into a lecture in a meaningful way, you can’t not do the readings.

I DIGRESS (as per usual). Time to kick this generation’s ass. But first, a word from our retiring torchbearers…

Arabella: Peace at last! I am so relieved I could just fart sparkles!

Razor: I am honoured to be a part of this manly, manly picture.

Fun fact—I call them “retiring torchbearers” but neither has fulfilled a LTW as of yet, because they are useless because their LTW’s are a bitch and a half. Thus, as sick of them as we may be, they still have some screen time to look forward to.

2.10 There Can Be Only One

Great news! Finals are over and I’m pretty sure I didn’t fail them. In fact, I may have even maintained my straight-A reputation, but that remains to be seen and I don’t want to jinx anything so I’m going to stop talking about grades now and transfer my enthusiasm to whatever the fuck is happening in the screenshot below… a.k.a. motherly affection from Arabella??? Jesus, this is Tewl’s monogamous streak all over again.

Katana: Um, why are you touching me?

Arabella: I heard you were upset about being grounded. So, pip pip cheerio and all that.

Katana: I don’t think that means what you think it does.

2.8 Journey to the Fire Nation

Hell yes, that’s an Avatar reference. My brother has me back in the habit of watching morning cartoons, so I’ve been getting through two episodes on Netflix every day while I eat my dinosaur egg oatmeal.

I’m off to teach kids how to play Quidditch in an hour or so, but we’ll see how much of this I can get through in the meantime.

(My life isn’t always this awesome, I swear.)

Looks like these losers have been living it up pretty good, too. Lots of slacking off and childish games and shit.

Tommy: Dad, we’ve been at this all day. Can I please go to bed now?

Razor: No, son. I must train hard if I wish to be a martial arts master. And, uh, you may have to help me uncrick my neck.

1.12 Boyz Will B Boyz

Hello again! First, since for some silly reason I haven’t done this yet, I just want to say thank you to everyone for your lovely comments. I know it sounds cliché, but I honestly wouldn’t be able to keep writing this if not for your feedback and encouragement. I felt pretty crappy about the last chapter after I posted it, but your kind words turned my day right around. So I just wanted to let you guys know that you’re awesome and I love you all!! ❤

But now I must get back to writing about people I don’t love. *Sigh*… It amazes me just how affectionate some people become toward their legacy Sims. Don’t get me wrong, the Langurds and I have a special kind of connection. I just don’t think I would dare broach the “L” word with the likes of Tewl and his clan.

That said, it is still my duty to lead them through the dark territory that is the legacy challenge! Presently, we return to them in the midst of a financial crisis.

At least it’s not $0, but keep in mind their bills aren’t cheap and we have eight mouths to feed and not nearly enough beds to go around, because these guys are all idiots and have either negative or no relationship with each other. So what did we do?

1.10 Da Retern of da Flayme

I’m running out of intro ideas so I put some Magikarps up there to grab your attention. Did it work? I hope so.

(WARNING: This chapter contains more toddler spam than it is advisable to consume in one sitting.)

At the end of last chapter, Morgana went into labour for the second time and I know you all want to see what she gives birth to (kittens? Turtles? Blenders?) so let’s cut to the chase.