7.11 Login Time-out

Ah, seven eleven! A harbinger of good fortune! A store of conveniences, and the source of all the kimbap and soju that keeps me alive!

If ever there was a chapter destined for greatness, it’s this one. Surely we can expect only good things to—

CALAMITY NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

I’m sorry but this one really did me dirty. I left her to look after the grandkids while we were in China and didn’t even think to check on her when we got back. At some point I just noticed her icon missing and had to go looking for an urn. She must’ve been right at the 90-day mark because I was not ready. Evidently she returned to the ether somewhere on the path between the couch and the fridge, which is some small solace.

Bottom line though, playable ghost deaths are not cool. 0/10 will not be keeping Kip or Trance around long enough to experience this again.

Cal… enjoy your forever nap I guess.

5.2 Trouble in Paradise

Another chapter so soon?! (You ask in distress.) I’m sorry. I should probably leave a courtesy buffer or something but sometimes the words just keep flowing, y’know?

Last time, Gumby fell in love with Frieda Salas, an evil ghost who wants to kill him and steal his money. Lira had tea with her SimBots and lamented the curse of aging. Mandrake broke my game, and Boa tried in vain to die by jelly bean. I know now that that can’t happen, but for the sake of continuity and my pride I’m going to pretend I am none the wiser.

(Pretend not to be wise? How ever shall I do that?)

Gumby’s second date with Frieda was a raging and unreasonable success. I know the shot I gave you last chapter was a little stingy, so here’s a better look at her face.

Frieda: So hypothetically, what colour would you want your ghost to be?

Gumby: I don’t know. Why?

Frieda: Oh, no reason.

For anyone wondering, this is her real, EA-given colouring. All of the Midnight Hollow ghosts seem to look like this underneath, i.e. so white they must have been genetically engineered by Hitler himself.

2.9 Blood Allies

Sooooo as much as I want to rant about the reasons for my absence, I am literally so busy that I don’t have time to think about things before I write them down (hence that questionable use of “literally”) or else I will never ever get this chapter done until I am old and grey and unable to formulate sentences and UGH here’s a picture to better illustrate my point because university is a goddamn pain goddammit

F my life. So so much.

But then there’s also this stack, sitting exactly at eye level every time I am writing a paper, because Origin was having a sale and HOW WAS I SUPPOSED TO RESIST?

2.6 Lancelot the Brave

This is coming to you from a retirement village where I am currently hijacking the wi-fi of an unsuspecting elderly couple. Never have I been so proud of myself.

Before I start this update, I thought I’d share some of my adventures in the Land of Distraction. For starters, I had promised myself that I could start building the new legacy house after Chapter Five. The current one, with its artsy glass corridors and towers, was having a lot of routing problems and anyway, it’s just ugly. So I told myself: “Let’s make a nice, simple family home that won’t lag my game or generate foot-tapping vortexes to entrap my sims forever.” With that in mind, I opened up 15 Summer Hill Court in another save file…

…and built a house so elaborate and expensive that it blew the Langurd budget by more than $100,000.

I have a problem.

Anyway, I don’t want to unveil it just yet (too much awesomeness for one chapter, I fear) but I did let my simself take an abbreviated tour, so here are some snippets of that:

Far Inferior Version of Myself: THERE’S A CANNON. WHY IS THERE A CANNON?

In case Gurbin comes back, obviously. But never mind that! Step inside the newest Casa de Langurd, featuring…