7.18 Conflict

Here we are at last! The final chapter of—

Nah, I can’t. That’s too cruel a joke.

You see, the previous longest Langurd generation finished at eighteen chapters. That was Gen. 4, when I sent the dweebs to university and did the dual heirship thing. The others have ranged from ten to sixteen, but it’s always an even number for some reason.

Today, we hit eighteen chapters on Gen. 7, and the amount of stuff that has yet to happen is ABSURD. I haven’t blocked anything out beyond 20, but my current guess is… 28? 30? And that’s just until I can post an heir poll.

The biggest worry is that this is the ONE generation where I can actually run out of chapter titles, because there is a finite number of the thing I’m basing them on. At the very least, they’re going to start sounding really dumb. I did NOT think this through, guys!

Shall we begin?

After witnessing Dusty’s tryst with his boss from across the street, Siesta stumbles out into the front yard with hot tub brain. Her gallivanting children are all trickling in just before curfew, so it’s bonding time.

Siesta: So that weather. It sure is weathery, huh?

Kiko: Mom, let’s be straight. Do you remember my name?

7.1 I’m a teapot

Hello, and welcome back to the Langurds! For real this time – no more filler bullshit. If you don’t believe me, take a moment to breathe in the scent of decaying tofu dogs and evaporating brain cells.

Oh yeah, we’re back alright.

Turns out I remember zero things from last generation, but I do know that there was a terrible, awful, very no good heir poll and y’all panic-voted this box-headed fool into leadership. I think we will regret this soon, but for now it’s full steam ahead!

Commence the celebratory tea! (I hope she showed up on time)

Siesta: Hey Prototype, I’ve been thinking.

Prototype: God help us all.

Siesta: Since I’m in charge and stuff, I’m going to rename you Siri.

Prototype: Pray tell why?

Siesta: Don’t be silly, Siri. You answer my questions, not the other way around!

Prototype: You poor dense soul.