4.3 Bake Your Cake and Eat It Too

Hello again! Can I just say how glad I am that people are still reading thing? Otherwise, I’d have no one to address these introductions to, and I’d have to be all impersonal and start every chapter with “Dear Diary, here is what I accomplished today while I sat on my butt.” And no one would be there to judge my failures, so I would have absolutely no standards… Oh, right.

Last time, Katana completed her LTW, Drachma became a cat lady, Florin showed up like twice, and everyone was really sad about Dax for some reason. I don’t expect we’ll be nearly so productive today, but here goes anyhow!

Aww look, it’s family meal time! Appropriately, Florin the half-sibling is only half in the shot.

Weston: Well, girls, I daresay I’ve got the hang of this Langurd Life.

Drachma: Not until you’ve mastered Lev’s technique.

Lev: The trick is not to differentiate between the openings on your face.

2.8 Journey to the Fire Nation

Hell yes, that’s an Avatar reference. My brother has me back in the habit of watching morning cartoons, so I’ve been getting through two episodes on Netflix every day while I eat my dinosaur egg oatmeal.

I’m off to teach kids how to play Quidditch in an hour or so, but we’ll see how much of this I can get through in the meantime.

(My life isn’t always this awesome, I swear.)

Looks like these losers have been living it up pretty good, too. Lots of slacking off and childish games and shit.

Tommy: Dad, we’ve been at this all day. Can I please go to bed now?

Razor: No, son. I must train hard if I wish to be a martial arts master. And, uh, you may have to help me uncrick my neck.

1.8 Angellz ‘n’ Demunz

And once more, welcome back! If I end up posting this when I mean to, I must say that I’m rather shocked at my own productivity. If not, well… there’s really nothing new there, and I apologize for my lazy butt.

In any case, I guess I have no choice but to be productive from this point forward. I’ve officially played through as much of Generation One as I can without posting an heir poll (spoiler alert: I’m absofrigginlutely excited for that) so now I just have to caption a bajillion screenshots. Let’s get started on some of that, shall we?

Last chapter, the boys became BACHILLERZ NO MOAR when Morgana and Tuesday moved in to their pad, which is also no longer a pad because we used all of Morgana’s money to build a real house. YAY. Then, Chris and Tuesday got married at a party that may go down in Sim history as the most awkward social gathering ever. That party wasn’t quite over when I ran out of steam last chapter, so I guess it’s back into the chaos we go.

Most of the guests did the right thing and ditched after Round 27 of Let’s-All-Try-to-Walk-through-this-Two-Foot-Gap-at-the-Same-Time-Ready-Go, everyone’s favourite party game. Some, however, did not.

Boyd, for one, was still absurdly determined to woo Tewl’s girlfriend. Like, what the hell?

Boyd: Now hold up a second, Morgana. I am a scientist. I can provide for you. Are you honestly saying you’d rather stay with this tool of a man?

Morgana: Yes, Boyd. You’re a raisin, not to mention one hundred percent crazy. You’re a crazy raisin. A craisin! I can’t date a craisin.

Pauline: Oh-ho-ho! Check out Tuesday getting mauled by that door! What a loser, amirite?

NO ONE LIKES YOU, PAULINE.

Tuesday: I am not at all impressed.