7.4 Loop Detected

IT IS TIME

smaug

To make like Smaug and start hoarding posts for SimNoWriMo! It’s only the middle of August, but I’m awkwardly motivated and we all know that won’t last long. So let’s find out just how much gas is left in the inspiration machine!

Screenshot-1308

Rhapsody: What is inspiration?

What a terrible place to start. Rhapsody is the slowest skiller ever, and even she’s over it.

Screenshot-1339b

Everyone else is twelve leagues BEYOND over it.

Calamity: Dinner’s ready.

Rhapsody: Okay, let me finish this—

Calamity: DINNER’S READY.

Rhapsody: …Point taken.

Screenshot-1303

Siesta is set to finally attend her first day of high school, if she can just make it onto the bus – and with Kip out of the mix, things are looking good!

Siesta: That’s right, here I am. You can’t drive over me if I’m standing in the road.

Ummm, I wouldn’t count on that…

Screenshot-1306

…but mission success!

Siesta: Well, that was easy. For once.

Driver: Your brother must be feeling merciful today.

Trance: *dramatic sigh* No, I just left my wallet inside.

Screenshot-1310

The morning commute isn’t hitch-free for everyone.

Calamity: Something terrible has happened.

Screenshot-1312

How is that terrible? Look at all the ice cream you have now!

Calamity: But my truck…

Is now the coolest hybrid vehicle of all time. Jeez Cal, lighten up.

Screenshot-1314

House: Did somebody say “light it up”?

No man, get’cho ears checked.

Screenshot-1318

Have no fear! Calamity the Bushwhacking Firefighter is on the case.

Cal: Too bad the hose is all clogged up with soft serve.

Even better!

20170724131129_1

This charming little abode with minimal windows affords Calamity her first A Grade on a Large House Fire, and a real chance to stick it to the haters!

Screenshot-1321b

But you can’t please everyone.

Morida O’Connell: What have you been doing? I called you here to save my precious plants!

Cal: Ma’am, it’s November.

Morida: But they’re DYING.

Cal: Have you thought about a greenhouse?

Morida: What does the colour of my house have to do with anything? I want to speak to your manager!

I can’t believe I’m saying this about the Langurds, but I think we know which side Siesta got her IQ from…

Screenshot-1335b

The real tragedy is when she summons her equally dumb cousin Samir for a study session and they both just get mad and erase  a lot.

Siesta: Your grandpa’s a doctor, I thought you knew stuff!

Samir: You told me you built robots!

Screenshot-1331b

I’m not 100% sure, but I think Jada lives here now. She’s a real treasure of a roommate.

Jada: So I hear it was YOUR robot who seduced Breandan. Just what kind of seductive assets does she have that I don’t, huh?

Siesta: I’m still figuring that one out myself.

Screenshot-1341b

Siesta figuring things out is so painful to watch, I’m glad Cal has taken to solving life’s problems by shoving carbonara in people’s faces.

Cal: Dinner’s ready.

Siesta: Let me just finish this—

Cal: I SAID DINNER’S READY.

Screenshot-1343b

Kip and Jada are in sync in a way that none of us could have seen coming.

Jada: I just want to go downstairs!

Kip: Let’s go together.

Jada: It’s really hard to slide down a pole with a ghost fused into you, Kip.

Kip: Lol carry me.

Screenshot-1349b

Sadly, most of their wavelength sharing is hardly aesthetic.

Screenshot-1350b

Aren’t you the slightest bit disgusted with yourself?

Kip: I’ve never felt closer to anyone.

Screenshot-1347b

Know what else I didn’t see coming? Jada’s weird fondness for Storm.

Storm: Why? Why is that so surprising to you?

Jada: Whoa Sally! Ain’t nobody slowing this mustang down, am I right?

I don’t think I ever wrote down her YA trait, but Equestrian is entirely possible. So is Country Bumpkin.

20170723231554_1

Yes, thanks Jada. This is probably a good idea. Too bad I don’t take orders from you.

20170724121044_1

Here’s some fun trivia about Jada that I must have deemed more important than her fifth trait. Up until the end of last chapter, she was dating Jerald Murphy-Finnigan – the younger brother of Delilah, Trance’s girlfriend.

 20170724121024_1

Of course we kicked him to the curb with no remorse.

20170724121647_1

The poor guy immediately cycled through some old lady flirts, but ultimately…

20170724125128_1

…wound up marrying Ani-Mei’s simself. It’s a twisted web around here, but everyone ends up… happy? I think?

20170723232124_1b
20170724161714_1
20170724161728_1

Er, maybe not Jada. After I cruelly dashed her Law Enforcement dreams (too much effort for a spare’s partner) she had a brief identity crisis, coming up with several plans for her blank canvas. I fulfilled none of them.

Screenshot-1348b

Back on track – looks like Cousin Samir (a LeffJeff offshoot, just FYI) can’t tell when the homework party’s over.

Samir: I’m still on Question 1!

Dear lord, child.

Screenshot-1356b

Calamity never fails to save the day.

Cal: This is my granddaughter. Well, grandrobot. Her name is Siri. She’s my niece’s stepmother now.

Samir: WHAT THE FUCK.

Screenshot-1328b

If only they all had such nurturing instincts. Ahem.

Trance: What?

The baby, Trance.

Trance: Yes.

She’s crying.

Trance: Yes, but there’s a camera so I need to smolder.

For the love of—

Screenshot-1357b

Cal, I genuinely adore you.

Screenshot-1359b

Cal: One mushed carbonara coming right up!

Riza: They’re noodles, lady, how much mushier can they get?

She’s not the most pleasant child, as it turns out…

Screenshot-1362b

…and I’m not the only one who thinks so.

Riza: Bitch, that plate was empty ten minutes ago. I WANT A PUPPET SHOW.

Siesta: Can I bail on this having kids thing?

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

Siesta: Why are you laughing like that?

No reason.

20170724132000_1

I’ve been keeping an eye on Dusty in SP, but this is all the hope we have to go on.

YES, GUYS. ERUPT THOSE DISPUTES. BE UNAMUSED.

The thing I hate the most is that they’re actually really cute together.

Screenshot-1365b

At the very least, our little blockhead might be an established Bot Builder before she starts a family. I have no idea what her skill level is, but she can build Nanites now! Or that’s what the game says, anyway.

Siesta: One – nanite – please! *taps button*

Machine: Deleting all data in five… four… three…

Siesta: NO DON’T PLEASE

Screenshot-1363b

She can only dream of one day being as masterful in her field as— hey Calamity, why is there a horse in your garage?

Cal: I’m upgrading the horsepower.

With what, its blood?

Cal: Nah, he runs on a treadmill at night.

Like THAT’S any less morbid.

Screenshot-1364b

Horse: Goodbye, world.

This is me / Life should be / Mmm mmm yeah / Fun for everyone!

Horse: *cries*

Screenshot-1370b

Round of applause, please. Seven generations in, Kip may just be the first Langurd with enough cooking skill to prepare her favourite meal.

Kip: Pumpkin spice pie!

Pumpkin pie. The spice is implied.

Kip: You did not just say that.

Screenshot-1371b

Kip: You know, this would go really well with a dirty soy chai latte.

Trance: So help me if you walk away from that oven, girl.

Screenshot-1375b

The pie is clap-worthy, and Siesta’s hoping her cardboard circuitry will make her better at homework.

Siesta: Minor problem — I can’t see.

Kip: And can’t have any pie either OH WHAT A SHAME.

Screenshot-1373b

It’s also a shame Jada can’t appreciate her girlfriend’s cuisine, since all she does is dick around studying the pool tiles.

Jada: They’re a fascinating species.

Screenshot-1380b

Fascinating enough, apparently, that she forgets to come up for air.

Jada: Blub?

Screenshot-1383b

I tell her to gtfo, so she climbs up on this tiny island thing.

Jada: I AM THE SOLE SURVIVOR

Screenshot-1385b

The thing is, every time she tries to get to the mainland, she starts drowning again.

Screenshot-1386b

And then autonomously climbs back into the bush.

Jada: Was this a mistake?

Here I was hoping she had brains to match her supermodel looks.

Screenshot-1387b

Brief interlude to acknowledge Rhapsody’s first attempt at parenting.

Riza: Hi Mama!

Rhapsody: How about Mama puts on a little private concert for Riza?

Riza: Bye Mama! *deadweights on the floor*

Screenshot-1389b

Two hours later, Jada has gone well and truly Castaway Crazy.

Jada: WIIIIIIIIIIILSOOOOOOOOON

Screenshot-1388b

Jada: Fuck, I give up. Get me out of this mess.

Screenshot-1390b

Tbh, this is something I never thought I’d have to do for a sim.

Jada: I should work out more.

Um no, I’m pretty sure that’s what got you INTO this mess.

Screenshot-1392b

I was set to end this chapter right here, but then I realized that we reached literally no milestones in those 40-odd screenshots. Which is probably not okay.

Siesta: Milestones are for chumps.

That’s fine, I’m sure your brother and sister have something for me.

Siesta: Wait, but I’m the heire—

Screenshot-1393b

Thank you, Trance!

Trance: Glow up? Please, I’m already glowing.

Kip: Please let him glow out of that dumb t-shirt dress!

Screenshot-1395b

Kip: Yesss, rock that Elvish MetalheadTM!

Trance: Did you just trademark my birthday look?

Kip: Maybe.

He rolled Diva, but it’s not like we didn’t see that one coming.

Screenshot-1407b

The new look is short-lived, and so his youthful independence. It’s time to seal the deal before his high school sweetheart realizes how much better she can do.

Delilah: Trance, is that you? Wow, you’re like a new man!

Trance: And I can make you feel like a new woman, baby.

Screenshot-1408b

Delilah: I was kidding, dumbass. You look exactly the same.

Trance: The offer stands though.

Screenshot-1424b

Ironically, she is in fact due for a makeover. New Delilah dresses like a suave career woman but actually just quit her job to nap prettily while her boyfriend tends to his motives.

Screenshot-1426b

Trance: Okay, I am ready.

Delilah: Ready to fix that annoying wall speaker?

Trance: Nah, we ignore that.

Screenshot-1429b

Trance: Ready to do this, though.

Delilah: Not bad, pretty boy. Sure beats the last time we stood here.

Trance: Why, what happened last time?

Delilah: Oh, it’ll come back to you.

Screenshot-1434b

Trance: I think it’s coming back to me…

Delilah: Tell me this isn’t happening again.

Screenshot-1435b

Oh, it’s happening.

Delilah: YOU SAID YOU TOOK CARE OF YOUR NEEDS

Trance: Er, I was napping?

Delilah: YOUR ENERGY IS IN THE YELLOW

Screenshot-1438b

Trance: Well… now you’re in the yellow too. 😀

Delilah: Oh for fuck’s sakes Trance.

Screenshot-1441b

Trance: Let me make it up to you.

Delilah: What are you doing?

Trance: Will you, Delilah…

Delilah: You DO realize this is the worst possible moment for a proposal?

Screenshot-1444b

Trance: …allow me, Trance…

Delilah: We are in a PUDDLE of URINE.

Trance: …to do you the great honour…

Delilah: There is a HORSE BUTT.

Trance: …of becoming your husband?

Screenshot-1451b

Delilah: Well, I definitely don’t want to repeat this experience, so… what the hell.

Trance: Yusssss! Nailed it.

All I can think of his how gross that sock must feel.

Screenshot-1452b

But as far as Trance is concerned, he’s walking on sunshine.

Trance: Sorry, Mac and Cheese. I only burned you because I was so distracted by how AWESOME I am.

Jada: Ugh, why is he like that?

Some questions are best left unanswered.

Screenshot-1460b

And some egos are best left unindulged, but Trance’s classmates went and voted him “Most Likely to Save the World.” Great.

Trance: How am I supposed to go out and do cool things when I literally walk to the same mediocre beat every day?

Rhapsody: I know, right?

She MUST be done soon?! If I find out she has another instrument to max, I’m gonna flip my shit.

Screenshot-1453b

Look at you, all fancy for your brother’s graduation! Surely  you can muster some table manners for the occasion.

Kip: I… I think I can do this.

Screenshot-1454b

Kip: SNARF SLURP SNORT

Your mouth isn’t even open???

Kip: Oh yeah, I guess that would help.

She and Jada are truly a match made in heaven.

Screenshot-1456b

HEY, I thought I closed the time portal??!

Plumbot: You did, but I heard a baby crying so I overrode the system.

Riza: Feed me, slave. But if I get liquid noodles again I’m selling you for parts.

Screenshot-1458b

Plumbot: Uhhhh no thanks.

Jk, even the immigrant robot doesn’t want to deal with her.

Screenshot-1462b

Looting the ancestors’ troves, eh? That couldn’t possibly mean I’m getting bored and grasping for ways to draw out my spares’ lives…

Screenshot-1465b

Kip: What’s that, Egypt? Why yes, it totally does!

_____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

FANCY SIMNOWRIMO PROGRESS TRACKER
Update #: 1 (goal 10)
Screenshots: 59 (goal 200)
Words: 1800 (goal 10,000)

Sadly, this is the only scheduled post in my arsenal, so from hereon out I am a real-time slave to this blog. Pray for me, friends.

Oh, and go sign up for yourself if this looks like fun.

Happy Simming!

-Sam

Advertisements

About gryffindork7

I like cats. This is a really thorough bio.

Posted on September 1, 2018, in Generashun 7. Bookmark the permalink. 1 Comment.

  1. LIFE IS EASY IF YOU WEAR A SMILE, JUST BE YOURSELF DON’T EVER CHANGE YOUR STYLE, YOU ARE YOOU, I AM ME, WE’LL BE FREE!

    *ahem* Sorry about that, but you just triggered my 15 year old self XD

    Poor Rhapsody. Poor Siesta.

    JADA HOW ARE YOU SO DAMN STUPID?? She has a head like a flower pot; pretty on the outside and empty on the inside (alternately, full of shit). But hopefully she’ll finally realise that she and Kip are destined to be together, and produce some cute babies that you can upload for me to plop into one of my various incomplete challenges >:D 😉

    Honestly, even though you’d written it out a few times, I’d still completely forgotten Riza’s name. Why can’t she be more like her namesake!?!? Also, just when I thought parents couldn’t get any worse than Liz, there’s Rhapsody.

    Oh Trance, you useless fool.

    And hey, nobody said Siesta has to marry her baby daddy (lookin at’chu, Rhapsody), or even just have ONE baby daddy (*cough*Katana*cough*)!! So maybe Dusty can be seduced into Gen Eight production, and then left to frolic happily through story progression with his lover!
    But I also know you’ve probably played this generation to an end, so that’s totally pointless of me to point out. OR MAYBE I’M SEEING THE FUTURE!?

    lol, enjoy your essay comment XD

    Like

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: